Dear Old Navy,
Thanks for the feel good marketing techniques, mostly.
I realize that the last few months have been filled with junk food and sugar and booze and not much time in the gym, but it was tough when I tried on my "nice" shorts this year and most of them didn't fit. I was sad and am resolved to remedy the situation as quickly as possible.
But this is Texas, where temperatures have already hit 90 degrees, so I can't quite wait until my exercise and sensible eating plan reshapes me. Side note: Bring it on Jillian.
Under a little cloud, I headed to Old Navy for some cheap shorts to tide me over.
O.N., we have some things to discuss. This whole manipulating the sizes thing? I am not too sure about it. On one hand, it was good for my self esteem to find some new shorts that are the same size as the shorts that don't fit at home. On the other hand, it's a pain in the ass to take 74 sizes into the dressing room and truthfully, shouldn't I be aware that I need a bigger size? In the name of my health and well-being? And you aren't even consistent!
I am 5 foot 6 inches tall and hit puberty many (many) years ago. Let's be honest with each other, I should never ever need an extra small. But I found a nifty flouncy skirt on the clearance rack in exactly that size that fits great hanging next to a pair of XS shorts that I am quite sure I couldn't get one leg in. Mixed messages are not good things to send to women of any age.
Don't worry O.N., I am not giving up on you yet - you have a groovy dog mannequin.
(Size XS, S, M, 2, 4, 6, 8, and probably some 10s)